Ode to Lamar Cox

First, a note: I worked for Lamar Cox and his wife Sandra for twenty years. He died this March. I was asked by his family to speak at his June memorial service, and the poem that follows is what I shared. 

For Lamar Cox 

It’s a rare person who does it all well – 

From modest beginnings, who could foretell 

The heights you would rise to, the ways you’d excel? 

On mental agility first let us dwell: 

In the first cohort of Black enrollees 

At U Cincinnati Engineering, 50’s, 

The six of you studied, and then stayed in touch, 

For breaking that barrier enabled so much. 

You ran the high hurdles on the track team 

Though for your height and build, that looked extreme – 

It’s the spring in your stride, not the length of your limbs 

That launches you upward, those hurdles to skim. 

In corporate America you found a place 

To tap into your insight, in the rat race 

But patents and kudos could not suffice – 

Being your own man was worth sacrifice. 

But without a partner, what is a life? 

On your second go, you met your soul’s wife. 

From New York to Washington, finding your spot: 

The American Enterprises juggernaut. 

And that’s where I met you, in an interview 

For office assistant – you thought I would do 

Helping you manage your businesses there 

I worked for a couple beyond compare. 

On alarm systems and CCTV 

You applied the knowledge of your degree -

A motion sensor, in a house with a cat? 

Sure, you had a solution for that. 

Upside-down mounting would keep it from seeing 

That false-alarm magnet, jumping and fleeing. 

Your intuition alerted you 

When embezzlement came into view 

Without a fuss you put it right -

I admired that insight. 

To set up shop in Silver Spring 

You proved you could do anything: 

Cutting new doorways, finished and fine, 

Track lighting making the showroom shine – 

I watched you cut glass shelves like a pro, 

Scoring above then tapping below, 

Breaking them cleanly along that edge – 

A deft and able personage! 

Did I mention your musical gift? 

Operatic tones through the office would drift – 

And hosting friends at Christmas parties, 

With Charlotte Douglass on the keys 

Leading us all to sing a carol 

In our holiday apparel. 

Stories you shared – a bit of New York lore – 

A customer at the floral store 

Who occasioned a running gag: 

“You couldn’t put a dog in a bag!” 

 In marriage, you advised, “fight fair – 

Calling names you should foreswear. 

Never hit then when they’re low 

 That’ll be you sometime, you know. 

Once you’ve fought, then let it go – 

You don’t need bravissimo. 

A cultivated love will grow 

Stronger when kindness you bestow.” 

We miss you, Lamar, your life well made 

Inspires every accolade: 

Employer, and a mentor too – 

As family I think of you – 

No one can be in another’s skin 

But soul to soul, we’re still akin. 

Love, NC Weil